Many men feel pressure to last a long time in bed. While partners may occasionally enjoy lengthy sensual sessions, sometimes men have unrealistic expectations of themselves. For one, the average man finishes within 3 to 7 minutes of continual thrusting. There are ways to lengthen lasting time, and these techniques are worth learning for better sexual health and enjoyment.
Sometimes, though, an emphasis on lasting time can obscure the fact that the occasional quickie can be highly enjoyable for both partners. A man may be missing opportunities for hot, speedy romps if he stakes his manliness or sexual prowess on duration. A feverishly fast escapade here and there can add excitement to a couple’s sex life, so quickies should not be ruled out. The following tips will help a couple incorporate brief and steamy bouts of lovemaking into the repertoire.
Get on the same page.
When it comes to anything sex-related, it’s important that both partners are on board. Therefore, when one partner has limited time, the other should be apprised of this and determine whether he or she is up for a quickie.
This can be approached in a matter-of-fact way, but a partner can heighten the sensuality of the moment by expressing the urgency of his or her desire. “I only have a few minutes, but I want you so badly”; “I really don’t want to walk out the door without going to town on you at least for a couple minutes.” Expressions in this vein are more likely to rev up a partner than something like, “I’ve got five minutes. You want to do it?”
Less time for sex means less time for foreplay. That means a couple may need to implement lube. Some women might not like the idea of very little foreplay before sex, in which case more time will be required to pull off a quickie; keep this in mind. If she’s down for some product-assisted play, however, a man should make sure to have it on hand.
If she takes longer…
Most heterosexual couples will notice that women generally take longer to climax than men. This could mean that a quickie does not result in orgasm for her. Some women are fine with that, whereas others want to finish every time. Both are perfectly legitimate positions.
If a woman doesn’t mind, then fine. If she does, then partners may be best off discussing quickies outside the moment. A woman may be content to finish on her own after a man leaves – maybe more so if she sends him a steamy email or text when she’s done describing her climax. (Note: Men, don’t read such correspondences while driving! Safety first.)
Another option a couple can try is incorporating a vibrator into the mix. Placing a vibrator against her clitoris can greatly shorten the time she takes to finish. However, it’s never a sure thing; partners should keep that in mind.
Try new places.
A quickie might be more enjoyable in a new location. Instead of in bed, for example, a man might bend his partner over the kitchen table or have the partner kneel on a couch or chair. This can add extra excitement.
When a man engages in a quickie, he’s likely to go a little harder and faster than usual (if his partner is into that). He may need to follow up such sessions with a little extra penile care. Using a penis health creme (health professionals recommend Man1 Man Oil) is a great way to maintain optimal skin condition, and not only after a quickie, but on a daily basis. Moisturizing the penis helps prevent soreness and chafing from friction, and can even preserve penile sensitivity in the long run. Both are imperative to a healthy sex life.